In an age where monologues are often either overly earnest or theatrically bombastic, it’s refreshing to encounter two sharply original, offbeat performances that bring to the stage equal measures of wit, satire, and identity-driven commentary. Though drastically different in premise, the monologues from “An Ideal Husband” and “What happened in Neverland stays in Neverland” form a surprisingly rich thematic diptych when viewed through the lens of performance: both characters wrestle with perception, miscommunication, and the absurd expectations others project onto them.
Monologue One: Adapted from “An Ideal Husband”
Ella Arnold delivers a masterclass in comedic pacing, internal conflict, and the crushing weight of unwanted heteronormative affection. Her protagonist is cornered — not by violence or betrayal, but by the insistent proposals of a clueless man named Tommy. It’s equal parts hilarious and deeply relatable, especially for queer audiences who know the experience of having their identity politely ignored.
Arnold infuses the piece with a cocktail of exasperation, dry wit, and just a hint of emotional fatigue. Each beat — the Achilles statue, the "bimetallist" deflection, the whispered doctor-like proposals — offers her space to shift tone and energy with precision. She doesn’t just milk the comedy; she finds the emotional truth in absurdity. Why is this funny? Because it’s so true. The emotional undercurrent is unmistakable: a queer person trying to be seen clearly in a world that keeps misinterpreting their silhouette.
Monologue Two: “What happened in Neverland stays in Neverland”
If the first monologue critiques the persistence of romance through the lens of identity, the second deconstructs villainy through the mouth of a jaded crocodile — yes, that crocodile — from Peter Pan. But in Arnold’s capable hands, this isn’t just slapstick animal humor; it’s a savvy, fourth-wall-breaking satire about stereotypes, PR disasters, and the overlooked talents of misunderstood beings.
Her crocodile is smart. Self-aware. Dryly philosophical. And more than a little bitter that one bite and a ticking clock have sidelined his dreams of Broadway stardom. The humor here skews more absurdist and whimsical than the Tommy monologue’s social satire, but the two pieces share something essential: both explore the damage done when individuals are flattened into caricature — whether it’s a lesbian mistaken for a marriage prospect, or a crocodile condemned as a lifelong predator.
Comparative Themes & Staging
Despite their different tones, both monologues are deeply character-driven. Each character is reacting to a version of themselves that the world insists is true — and pushing back, armed with humor. One is stuck in a cycle of proposals that ignores their sexuality; the other, locked in a public image shaped by fiction and fear.
Staging these two together — as Ella Arnold has done — perhaps as part of a themed one-act festival or showcase on misrepresentation, is a stroke of brilliance. Both monologues invite a minimal set and direct audience engagement. Arnold confidently breaks the fourth wall in both roles, inviting the audience into her characters’ strange, painfully relatable realities.
Final Verdict
Together, “An Ideal Husband” and “What happened in Neverland stays in Neverland” — as performed by Ella Arnold — represent two corners of a theatrical spectrum: one grounded in contemporary queer social commentary, the other in fable-like absurdity. But both speak powerfully to what it feels like to be misread by society, to want to be more than the one-dimensional version others insist upon.
Whether fending off clueless suitors or lobbying for a reptilian stage debut, Arnold proves that great comedy lies in truth — even when that truth is wrapped in fig jokes, bimetallism, or a crocodile’s unfulfilled dream of being Danny Zuko in Grease.
